Tuesday, May 08, 2007

stand up

first came the power lunch, then there was the power nap, and now, behold...the power shower.
This latest innovation in the field of multi-tasking is yet another shiny tool in the garden shed of skills of modern harried professionals. Where until now people were content to just stand in the shower letting water splash over them while at times using various types of cleaning products, this tremendous advancement for the cause of lost sleep puts you back in charge of your agenda. For instance on any given day I manage to shave, brush my teeth, clean my muscular hair and luscious body, with the whole thing never taking more than 8-10 minutes. Of course this feat is not for the weak of heart, as the first few times might require the kind of coordination that is not usually seen in the wee hours. But after a few broken bones and instances of after-shave smelling hair, you too will be able to make the most of your shower time, and never again have to endure the endless parade of sequential acts necessary to make you presentable before going out into the outside world. And the best part is that the power shower is highly customary, subject only to the bounds of your own imagination. Want to drink a Yakult before brushing your teeth? Sure, go right ahead! Fancy some chinups on the curtain bar? Alright, do me 20! Of course you should try to not get too carried away with the wonderful possibilities presented by this concept, as any shower longer than 10 minutes would not conceivably be in the realm of time-saving brilliance to enter that of shiftlessness and responsibility-shirking. But still, there are a great deal of things that can be accomplished in that time, and soon, you too will be able to extol the virtues of this revolution in workday preptime. The morning shower is dead, long live the morning shower!

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